It's too late, I'm sure, and lonely...
Another night, another dream wasted on you.
So just be here now, against me.
You know the words, so sing along for me, baby.
For heaven's sake I know, you're sorry. But you won't stop crying,
This anniversary may never be the same. Inside, I hope you know
I'm dying, with my heart beside me, in shattered pieces that
May never be the same... And if I died right now, you'd never be the same.
Today it's supposed to be somewhere in the middle-high fifties. Not yet sixty-eight, but we'll get there someday. My plans for the day consist of going to Staples with my mom to get a computer mat (that's not even for the computer) and.. cleaning. All day. I'll be extremely lucky if I push myself to eat. It's going to be a pain in the ass, but hopefully it'll be worth it. This house is embarassing. I'd finally like for it to be a home, not just a house.
It's nine-thirty in the morning and I know I shouldn't be awake. Though, I went to sleep pretty early. I guess I'd been asleep for about 12 hours. Shortly before I woke up, I had a really fast-paced dream about driving on the same road I ALWAYS dream about (so I'm starting to think there may be something to it...), going to see Alex. But, in my other dreams, it doesn't lead to go to Alex. I don't even know. Anyways. My mom and I get there, and we go to some Chinese restaurant. Which doesn't make sense, because, one. It's just past a parking garage and the restaurant is nowhere near there o.0. and two. Simply because, why would we get Chinese food, 4 stores down from A Taste of Burma? Paha, it makes no sense. ANYWAYS. In my dream, as soon as we left to go to the restaurant, it was Alex and his guuuurl. I woke myself up. I've had too many of those dreams recently.
So, more boy problems. Or maybe, things are getting better. I told Kyle like it is. I feel good about it. And there's this other boy.. hmph. Yeah, let's not get into it NOW.
TWO days ago;
Bear Phillips called me. He wants to chill. WOOO. With his friend Carlos, and then Amber. BOWLING Amber, haha. (turns out, he just wants to fuck her. I told him she wouldn't be an easy beat. And he goes 'Fucking kidding? There need to be more Emilie Bliss' in the world.') So we're in the car, Carlos is rolling, I'm in the passenger seat, Bear and Amber are in the back with Carlos's boxers... and Greg goes out to his car. So I knocked on the window and got him to come over. Opened the door and the seatbelt thing like raped my face. Pretty interesting. He agreed to come chill with us, so the four of us went inside while Carlos was still in the car rolling. Bear played music, and I made videos. It was pretty epic, honestly. Then Carlos came in. Funfunnn. The whole room smelled like.. yeah. Then Bear's like 'let's go smoke.' at the end of one of the videos, so we went out in back and that's what happened. It was actually amazing. When we all came back inside, we talked about everything in the world, watched For the Love of Ray J, and Bear and I drew pictures of everyone. The picture I got drawn by Bear was pretty degrading, haha. But I loved it. The other ones that I drew were worse anyways.
So, altogether, this week has been kind of... harsh. But it's been good. As of this Monday, there will be only five more weeks of winter. Be excited!
Love you all.
Kaybye,.
Another night, another dream wasted on you.
So just be here now, against me.
You know the words, so sing along for me, baby.
For heaven's sake I know, you're sorry. But you won't stop crying,
This anniversary may never be the same. Inside, I hope you know
I'm dying, with my heart beside me, in shattered pieces that
May never be the same... And if I died right now, you'd never be the same.
Today it's supposed to be somewhere in the middle-high fifties. Not yet sixty-eight, but we'll get there someday. My plans for the day consist of going to Staples with my mom to get a computer mat (that's not even for the computer) and.. cleaning. All day. I'll be extremely lucky if I push myself to eat. It's going to be a pain in the ass, but hopefully it'll be worth it. This house is embarassing. I'd finally like for it to be a home, not just a house.
It's nine-thirty in the morning and I know I shouldn't be awake. Though, I went to sleep pretty early. I guess I'd been asleep for about 12 hours. Shortly before I woke up, I had a really fast-paced dream about driving on the same road I ALWAYS dream about (so I'm starting to think there may be something to it...), going to see Alex. But, in my other dreams, it doesn't lead to go to Alex. I don't even know. Anyways. My mom and I get there, and we go to some Chinese restaurant. Which doesn't make sense, because, one. It's just past a parking garage and the restaurant is nowhere near there o.0. and two. Simply because, why would we get Chinese food, 4 stores down from A Taste of Burma? Paha, it makes no sense. ANYWAYS. In my dream, as soon as we left to go to the restaurant, it was Alex and his guuuurl. I woke myself up. I've had too many of those dreams recently.
So, more boy problems. Or maybe, things are getting better. I told Kyle like it is. I feel good about it. And there's this other boy.. hmph. Yeah, let's not get into it NOW.
TWO days ago;
Bear Phillips called me. He wants to chill. WOOO. With his friend Carlos, and then Amber. BOWLING Amber, haha. (turns out, he just wants to fuck her. I told him she wouldn't be an easy beat. And he goes 'Fucking kidding? There need to be more Emilie Bliss' in the world.') So we're in the car, Carlos is rolling, I'm in the passenger seat, Bear and Amber are in the back with Carlos's boxers... and Greg goes out to his car. So I knocked on the window and got him to come over. Opened the door and the seatbelt thing like raped my face. Pretty interesting. He agreed to come chill with us, so the four of us went inside while Carlos was still in the car rolling. Bear played music, and I made videos. It was pretty epic, honestly. Then Carlos came in. Funfunnn. The whole room smelled like.. yeah. Then Bear's like 'let's go smoke.' at the end of one of the videos, so we went out in back and that's what happened. It was actually amazing. When we all came back inside, we talked about everything in the world, watched For the Love of Ray J, and Bear and I drew pictures of everyone. The picture I got drawn by Bear was pretty degrading, haha. But I loved it. The other ones that I drew were worse anyways.
So, altogether, this week has been kind of... harsh. But it's been good. As of this Monday, there will be only five more weeks of winter. Be excited!
Love you all.
Kaybye,.
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